Hold My Heart
by Stars Align456
Summary: We all know the story of Lily and James' demise - but do we truly know their tale? Here is the story of how Lily and James moved from hate to love, from safety to war, from children to parents, until finally from life to death.
1. Prologue

**Hi everyone, this is my first ever fanfiction and it is an idea I have had in my mind for some time now! I hope you like it, but if you see any errors or areas of improvement, please let me know – I won't get any better otherwise.**

**Prologue – To Start at the End**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or anything related – all rights to J.K Rowling**

The cold terror spread through James' veins like wildfire, crackling through his blood and turning it to ice.

_How could this have happened? He was sure they could trust him; he had been their friend, their ally. How could he betray them now?_

These thoughts whistled through James' mind, until they all became blurred into one, but he knew none of that mattered now. All he could hope for that was that he had given them enough time to escape. If he could just hold him off in time for them to find a way out, then he could leave this world in peace.

_Crash!_

The door flew off its hinges, splinters scattering around the room like confetti, his shadow filling the hall. James felt himself swallow as he stared at the macabre creature before him, his midnight – black robes billowing around him, his pale lips curved upwards in a sickening and humourless smile.

"James Potter…" His voice was a whisper, but they seemed to echo off the walls as if he shouted them. "I will skip the pleasantries – give me the boy." At these words, James felt his fear give way to steely determination; he could not believe this monster simply expected him to give up his only son.

"I will never let you kill my son or hurt my wife." Voldemort's gruesome smile twitched only for an instant.

"Such a pity. _Avada Kedavra!" _James felt life leave him in a final gasp as the jet of bright green light connected with his chest.

At the other end of the house, Lily heard James' body hit the floor; she could not restrain the cry that escaped her lips. She leaned against the door, taking deep breaths until her eyes fell on Harry. Wiping away the tears that were cascading down her face, she knelt down in front of the large wooden cot where Harry sat, his bright green eyes so like hers, alight with curiosity.

"Harry my darling, you are going to have to be so strong…so brave." Lily's voice broke as she looked down on her small son, her last living fragment of James. "And I promise one day…we will see you again. I promise." Her voice was cut off by a deafening noise behind her. Standing up, she stood squarely in front of the cot, ready to face the monster.

The door suddenly flew open and there he stood, his wand raised, his scarlet eyes shone with something that resembled glee. Lily stood firmly in front of the cot, although ever muscle in her body was screaming at her to run.

"I'll make this simple for you…stand aside, I have not come for you – just the boy." Voldemort hissed; Lily found herself shaking her head. She screamed her defiance. She saw the monster raise his wand and saw his lips move as he uttered the spell that snap the thread of her fate. As the jet of emerald light flew towards her, she had just one simple thought in her mind.

"James…" She whispered as she too fell to the ground. Voldemort stepped over Lily's body as casually as if she had been a rug and prepared to cast the spell that would shatter his reign and crown Harry Potter as a living legend.

This is the part of Lily and James Potter's story that is known so well, yet it is the end. Just like any story, there was a beginning and a middle and now is the time to tell it….


	2. A Grave Incident

**Chapter One – A Grave Incident**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry P****otter or anything related – all rights to J.K Rowling**

Lily Evans had never been one to break the rules; she had of course had her own share of misdoings the most severe of which had caused her to receive an official warning from Hogwarts' Deputy Headmistress Minerva McGonagall. But those aside, Lily had tired her upmost to remain on the right side of the law, but tonight was yet another exception. Tonight she was on a mission.

Only half an hour before, one of Lily's fellow Gryffindor roommates – Vera Mellark, a curvaceous girl with chestnut tresses and the palest blue eyes – had flown into their dorm and proceeded to denounce all men in the world as 'bottom – feeding insects'. As it had turned out she had caught her boyfriend of no more than five months red – handed in a rather dust – ridden broom cupboard with an unnamed Ravenclaw source; however as Vera saw it one idiotic fifteen – year old boy's infidelity had placed the rest of the male gender in the firing line. After Lily's numerous attempts to lift her friend's spirits, involving the 'there are plenty more fish in the sea' speech, she had decided that now was the time for the Hogwarts' House – elves' best ice – cream.

As Lily padded her way down the dark, deserted corridors she could not help but marvel at the peacefulness of night time, usually the halls were so crowded with milling students their voices echoing off the stone walls there was little room to move, let alone time to stop and think. This tranquillity was quickly extinguished as the sound of whimpering met the redhead's ears; at first she had thought the source was one of the many paintings on the wall, the small brush – stroked figures mumblings as they slept on. But as the sound was more afraid, even painful and was with mounting horror, that Lily realised it was actually coming from behind one of the heavy classroom doors.

"_Nox._" Lily whispered and the silvery ball of light faded from the end of her wand, once again plunging the hall into darkness. Stepping forward, careful footstep in front of careful footstep, Lily felt for the door handle and pushed it open. Despite the lack of light, Lily could make out four tall figures although that was all she could tell as their long dark cloaks with the hoods pulled up rendered their identity anonymous. Lily's eyes slowly adjusted to the dim room as they travelled over the scene before her and her heart plummeted unpleasantly….

On the floor of the classroom, surrounded by the four cloaked individuals and curled up into a protective ball was a smaller figure. The source of the whimpering.

"Go on try it – you've been bragging about it for months." One of the cloaked ones hissed in a raspy voice, like rusty razors against a chalk board.

"Go ahead – let's see what this _wonderful _new curse of yours does."

Lily felt her fear melt away only to be replaced with a burning anger, her usual careful and diplomatic demeanour went out the window and she raised her wand, uttering the first spell that came to her mind: "_Expelliarmus!_" The nearest cloaked figure's wand was wrenched from his hand, causing the four offenders to turn their hooded gazes to their attacker.

Any thoughts of a fight that had entered Lily's mind quickly left it again as the four, obviously startled at being discovered, scurried away; leaving the red haired witch and their victim alone.

If Lily thought her innards had plummeted before, they plummeted far further as she realised the identity of the whimpering victim. Covered in blood, bruises and injuries that had sliced through her pale skin as well as her robes, was the fifth year Gryffindor – Mary MacDonald.

"Mary…oh God…" Lily's wand glided over Mary's prone form, trying to close the worst of her wounds. Her whimpering had ceased and purple lids had fallen shut over her grey eyes.

The sound of hurried footsteps brought Lily to her somewhat uneasy senses, not caring if they were friend or foe, only knowing that her fellow Gryffindor needed medical attention; she raised her voice.

"In here – please we need help!" The footsteps drew nearer, until shadows fell across the door, accompanied by the illumination of wands.

"Dear Merlin, what has happened here?" The squeaky voice of Professor Flitwick demanded, his authority making him appear much taller than the reality of his three – foot stature.

"I don't know…found her like this…" Lily tried to keep her voice calm, but the tears were coming fast and heavy now and she had no will power to stop them.

"Alright Miss Evans, we need to get Miss MacDonald to the Hospital Wing. Go and alert Madame Pomfrey." Glad to feel she was actually being of some use, Lily ran off towards the Hospital Wing using her wand to light her path and ignoring the objections of the sleepy paintings as she rushed past.

**oOOo**

The news of the attack spread like wildfire, as news so often did at Hogwarts; but what struck people more or rather seemed to, was the severity of the crime in question, something which was extremely evident in the tone of Dumbledore's voice the next morning.

"It is with great disappointment that I address you today," The Headmaster began the traditional twinkle that seemed to grace his periwinkle blue eyes had gone "The nature of the incident with Miss MacDonald was not a harmless prank but in fact a deliberate and brutal attack on a Muggleborn student. The identity of her attackers is still unknown, but I urge you that if you know anything that you come forward; this matter is beyond any friendships or loyalty. Until the culprits are found, Hogwarts will be under investigation by Ministry of Magic." The silence that followed Dumbledore's speech could have been cut with a knife as many students exchanged nervous glances and whispers.

"This is serious – I have never seen Dumbledore like that." Peter muttered worriedly.

"Of course it is, like Dumbledore said this was not an accident, this was a deliberate attack." Remus said looking between the group of Gryffindors huddled around him.

"Lily you were the one who found Mary – you must have seen _something._" Marlene McKinnon, a tall girl with honey blonde hair and intelligent brown eyes, interjected her tone at the point of desperation.

Lily felt like screaming, she had told them again and again that she had not been able to tell who the figures were and that she had been too concerned with the future heath of their friend to truly care who they were. Fortunately or unfortunately Lily was spared having to answer as a throat was cleared behind her. Turning their heads, the Gryffindors found themselves looking up at their Head of House, her traditional stern expression fixed on her face, although as Lily looked up at her, she could not help but detect a small glimmer of sadness in her eyes.

"Miss Evans, you are required to speak with the Ministry official as the sole witness to the incident." Lily nodded silently, getting up and following Professor McGonagall out of the Great Hall like a prisoner following her executioner to the gallows.

"She was there – how could she not have seen anything?" James Potter demanded once the aforementioned redhead was out of earshot.

"It was dark James and well…nobody has any idea who it was." Vera said, the boy next to her gave a disbelieving snort, drawing the group's attention.

"Come on – we all know who it was." Sirius Black said accusingly, his gaze pin – pointed to the Slytherin table who were chattering away, oblivious to Sirius' venomous stare. The others followed his line of vision; James, Marlene and Vera nodded whilst Remus and Peter continued to look apprehensive.

"Sirius, I know they're evil gits but don't you think that's…jumping to conclusions a little?" Peter tried timidly, he knew the affairs of Slytherin house was a touchy subject given a number of the Black family members resided there; but strains between the two seemed to have worsened considerably since Sirius' younger brother, Regulus had joined the previous term.

"Come on Peter look at the facts: one, Mary's a Muggleborn and two: Slytherins are nasty slimy little gits. I think that's pretty conclusive evidence." James backed up Sirius, clenching and unclenching his hands into fists under the table.

**oOOo**

Lily twiddled her fingers nervously, twisting the skin around the bone and trying to keep eye contact with the Ministry Official on the other side of the desk. He was a young man, no older than twenty – five with a somewhat lanky frame and pale blonde hair that was evenly parted and neatly cut. He gave Lily what was supposed to be a comforting smile, it made her want to run out of the room.

"Now, Miss….Evans; I know this is a difficult situation," he began his voice was much deeper than his appearance suggested as he regarded the young witch with searching dark eyes. "But we need to know just what happened last night – what you saw, what you heard, anything that might be relevant."

Lily explained how she had heard Mary whimpering, how she had investigated and seen the four figures in the empty classroom, once again explaining that their attire had not permitted her to gain any insight to who they were and Mary's state.

"Well from the Healer's report, she sustained injuries from the Cruciatus Curse, a scorching hex and a bone – breaking curse." The official ran through the list of offending spells as casually as if he was reading a grocery list, whilst Lily tried not to wince as each one was mentioned.

"Now Miss Evans this is very serious, not only has a student's life been put at risk but an Unforgivable Curse has been used. If you know anyone who would do this you need to tell me." When Lily spoke, she barely recognised her own voice, it was raspy and constricted.

"There are Slytherins who torment Muggleborns, pick them out for their blood status, but then a lot of Slytherins are like that – but most of them are just talk." The official raised an eyebrow at her last few words.

"'Most of them?' Are you implying that there are a few who would do something more?" Lily opened her mouth to speak, but not quite finding the right words. Of course there was somebody who would always be prepared to do more, there always was…

"Avery – Marcus Avery and Brandon Mulciber, I think they would take it the next step." The official nodded thoughtfully and scribbled something down on a sheet of parchment before him.

"Thank you Miss Evans, this has been very –"

"May I see her?" Lily interrupted, although she was almost sure she knew the answer "Please, I just want to know she is alright." The official seemed to be battling with himself, Lily could almost see the thoughts as they ran through his mind: allowing her to see a patient under questioning would be highly unorthodox but he knew in her shoes he would make precisely the same request.

"Five minutes, and I'll escort you."

**oOOo**

Mary knew she was lucky to be alive and not just because a man in a Healer's uniform had told her so. What little she could remember of the event sent chills clattering up and down her spine like a xylophone; she could hear their cruel laughs, their jeers, the hissing in her ears and blood, so much blood.

Because in the end that's what it all boiled down to: blood. She was a Muggleborn and in their eyes an unworthy form below animal level, an experiment for their sick little games.

"Miss there must be more that you can remember. Think." The Ministry official's voice was drilling into her brain; the same questions, the same inadequate answers and yet still he would not go away.

"I don't know I really don't….please stop…" Mary pleaded, her face screwing up as she began to feel the effects of the pain – dulling potion wearing off bringing back the sizzling pains of the still fresh scars that covered a large proportion of her upper body.

"Miss I must ask –" The official began again, his voice was becoming more and more irritable, but another much deeper voice halted him.

"Clarke, that's enough. There is paperwork that needs attending to." The official named Clarke cast a final look between Mary and the new visitor before striding, somewhat angrily, from the Hospital Wing.

"Sorry about him, he can be a bit…shall we say _over zealous. _My name is Mr Ferez and I am not here to ask you anymore questions just to deliver an eager visitor." Official Ferez said, side – stepping to reveal a very anxious – looking Lily.

Mary felt a suddenly elation as she looked at her friend, and her injuries were forgotten as she reached out a hand towards the other witch.

"Lily – you're a sight for sore eyes, literally." Mary greeted, feeling glad she had managed to retain some sort of sense of humour.

"Mary I'm sorry, if I got there sooner…" Lily began, her eyes roaming over the scars, the stitches and the vial of dreamless sleep potion. Mary placed a bandaged hand over Lily's trembling one and tried to give a small smile which turned into more of a grimace.

"Don't worry about that – you got there that's the main thing." Mary whispered.

"When do you get out?" Lily asked, trying to change the subject, forcing her voice to be more upbeat.

"A couple of days – Madame Pomfrey fixed me up pretty well. I'll be glad to have those Healers stop fussing over me." She rolled her eyes, although her gratitude to them was boundless.

"Well we'll have to have a little celebration when you get out." Lily smiled, but Mary's face fell as she felt the ache in her heart return as she prepared to break the news to her classmate.

"Lil, I'm not…I'm not coming back," Mary had to let the words sink for herself, there would be no 'next year at Hogwarts' for her. She kept her eyes off Lily's face, not wanting to see the disbelief and hurt she had felt when her parents had told her the same information just a few hours beforehand.

"My parents came by a couple of hours ago – Dumbledore owled them last night. They want to take me away and you know what – I think I agree with them. You're strong Lil, you can stand up to all the prejudice and the hurt but I can't and you have to admit that things have been getting darker each year. My parents want to go away, start afresh and I think it'll be good for us." She had screamed at her mother and father, but the more she thought about it all, the more it all made sense. She had almost died and next time it could be her family.

The two girls were silent for five long minutes, letting the news sink in, laying fresh hurt on top of the old.

"If that's what you want then we will all support you." Lily finally broke the silence, her voice wavering. "Just don't forget us."

"I could never forget you – any of you." Mary promised, pulling Lily into a warm sisterly embrace.

Although both Mary and Lily knew that this was not good bye, but rather a fond farewell, they held onto the hope that things would get better soon. But in the darkest and least favourable parts of their minds they were reminded of the old saying: 'things will always get worse before they get better'.

**OK guys well that was a long chapter (I did promise they would get longer) and I wanted to put out a massive thank you to all those who have followed/reviewed this story so far – I am very grateful!**

**Next chapter up soon (won't promise a date so I won't let you down)**

**Much love and hugs**

**~StarsAlign456**


	3. Author's Notice

**Author's Note**

Hey everyone – just to start, this is not to say I am quitting the story or anything like that!

I have created a tumblr page linked to this fanfic - I will be posting chapter summaries, character summaries and prologues of certain chapters to liven up my time!

So I will put the link of my tumblr page on my profile page – please take a peak and if you do/don't like anything you see or have any ideas – just PM me – I don't bite!

Just gonna take this chance to say a massive THANK YOU to all those who have commented/followed this story so far – I have not forgotten it, but I have recently got out of hospital and for that reason everything has been a tiny bit crazy right now – but will be back on track ASAP

So much love for you all and so many cupcakes!

~Freya


	4. Author's Note No2

**Author's Note No. 2**

Hey everyone—ok please don't kill me.

I am sorry I have been absent, for what seems like forever! But basically I have been in and out of hospital for several reasons, but anyways, I'm back. Well I have planned out my fanfiction completely now, I am going re-write it, but it will follow the same plot – line as before and I will be co – writing it with my newly found friend and passionate Jily lover, Grayling. She will be adding snippets to her own fanfiction site (which she promises she is going to set up soon) and basically character backgrounds, teasers for chapters and all that stuff!

So stay tuned – I will not disappear for this long again.

Mischief Managed!

~ Freya


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